The Board of Immigration Appeals has denied mine and my family's appeal to stop removal proceedings from the U.S.
This sparks a few fears and concerns in me that I cannot go without expressing.
What's going to happen next? Am I in removal proceedings as I write? I'm so freaked out and then not sure how to react.
Immigration has always been a sensitive topic amongst my family growing up. My dad never talked about it with us (my brother and I) and hushed us up if we brought it up. He was always the right one and knew what to do.
Unfortunately, our silence and his decisions have led us to where we are today. Of course we broke the silence in 2007 when I got arrested on immigration charges and spent nearly 4 months in immigration detention. We had no choice but to talk about it. However bad it felt then, I realize now that it was some kind of blessing. An odd one but a blessing none the less. Getting arrested finally led to some action on my case, something that was lacking for years.
Now that I have kids, this uncertainty & fear of the unknown is magnified. If only I had the guts to speak up then and talk to our lawyers or go further back and talk to my dad. I'd explain to him that the decisions he was making would harm us in the future. That he should not give conflicting testimonies and make us sign under the dotted lines. It isn't fair what has happened to us, that our own father, someone I know loves and cares deeply for us decided such terrible ideas would help his kids in the future. I know he didn't mean to hurt us but fear, a stubborn attitude and pride got in the way of his better judgement.
Now the court feels we have poor moral character and that we are not worthy of living in a country that we have called home for over 20 years. Is this right? I know we have made errors but is it right to judge us poorly and take away our right to live in this country because of our father's mistakes?
What about family culture, the fear instilled on us from immigration proceedings and my father's decision to keep us out of the decision making? Are we to blame for not speaking up because of the fear my father would get upset. When we were younger, it was enough to shut us up from one of the most important decisions he would make on our behalf.
It's not all black and white. There are complications in this case and the court should realize that. We'll have to wait and see what the future has in store for us...yet again.
Thanks for reading,
Urmi Sharna
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
What happened to our dreams?
Lately I've been wondering, what was it that I had set out to do with my life? I have 2 wonderful boys and a man I love in my life. I am grateful. But what were the dreams I had dreamt as a young girl? Do I even remember them?
Recently I started reading Paulo Coelho's "The Alchemist." It's got me thinking about these questions and my own calling. Can we do what we're doing now and still pursue whatever dream we've conjured up?
The very first thing I wanted to be as a kid was an astronaut. Well, that's not happening. But that was just a kid in love with the universe and the stars. After college I wanted to pursue journalism, it worked out on my own terms but after baby #1, it got pushed aside. Now that I have the opportunity to pursue it, I no longer dream of becoming a journalist unless it's for the NY Times or the like. Why? I'm so sick of mainstream journalism and the nonsense that's published day in and day out. I do not look forward to starting a career by writing about trashy people and their trashy ways.
So what do we do when our dreams are not on the top of the to-do list? We must make time. Don't sleep. Do whatever you have to but try to make some time for the things you love to do (or used to love).
My days are so packed with taking care of babies in the morning, cooking lunch, taking baby #1 to classes (or baby #2) then driving to the office to work that I forget about dreams, careers and such. But I do think about it when I can, I do dream and I do desire to do more with my life. Maybe I can't as fast as before this life got to busy but it's still possible. Should I leave the kids and go pursue a full time career? Not sure. It doesn't seem worth it. Maybe when they're older.
I like creating things, drawing, cooking, playing with my family, dancing, being happy. We should remember to be happy and grateful for all that we have because we have a lot. Maybe the big picture is this and the life we are still creating. I can do the little things to keep the smile on my face.
Thanks for reading,
Urmi Sharna
Recently I started reading Paulo Coelho's "The Alchemist." It's got me thinking about these questions and my own calling. Can we do what we're doing now and still pursue whatever dream we've conjured up?
The very first thing I wanted to be as a kid was an astronaut. Well, that's not happening. But that was just a kid in love with the universe and the stars. After college I wanted to pursue journalism, it worked out on my own terms but after baby #1, it got pushed aside. Now that I have the opportunity to pursue it, I no longer dream of becoming a journalist unless it's for the NY Times or the like. Why? I'm so sick of mainstream journalism and the nonsense that's published day in and day out. I do not look forward to starting a career by writing about trashy people and their trashy ways.
So what do we do when our dreams are not on the top of the to-do list? We must make time. Don't sleep. Do whatever you have to but try to make some time for the things you love to do (or used to love).
My days are so packed with taking care of babies in the morning, cooking lunch, taking baby #1 to classes (or baby #2) then driving to the office to work that I forget about dreams, careers and such. But I do think about it when I can, I do dream and I do desire to do more with my life. Maybe I can't as fast as before this life got to busy but it's still possible. Should I leave the kids and go pursue a full time career? Not sure. It doesn't seem worth it. Maybe when they're older.
I like creating things, drawing, cooking, playing with my family, dancing, being happy. We should remember to be happy and grateful for all that we have because we have a lot. Maybe the big picture is this and the life we are still creating. I can do the little things to keep the smile on my face.
Thanks for reading,
Urmi Sharna
Thursday, April 25, 2013
1st blog
Hi,
I'm (finally) starting this blog to get myself to open up about my life and share talents that I myself am just discovering. So it'll be personal, sometimes political, more crafty and filled with family tidbits of fun. Sorry, there's no one word that sums up all that.
I'm 29 for a precious few more days, a mother of two wonderful boys, we'll call them A & M, and wife to the love of my life (cheesy, I know). He's Ali, the man I met while in college, fell head over heals over, married and once graduated, moved to the other side of the state with.
Such is my life that my boys are young enough to cuddle, read to and still enjoy their "firsts." These are some of the best years.
I recently just got my driver's permit, ugh! I know. Why did I wait so long? Legal matters, my friends. President Obama passed the Deferred Action Policy last year, which has undoubtedly changed my life...since I got my approval letter. I can drive! Legally, too. Not to mention a relief from the threat of deportation for 2 years (yes, that's some serious shit). Thanks Mr. President.
You would think that a girl who graduates from college determined to become a journalist, who realizes her legal woes won't allow her to travel, drive or work will now, FINALLY go for it when the government has granted their permission. Well, life is not that simple. Motherhood, it has changed it all.
I find myself missing my kids, feeling guilty even if I think of leaving for the entire day. Thankfully, I've found some middle ground. I work as a Copy Manager at Enrich Ventures (this name will soon change). My hubby owns it, we work from the same office...it's awesome. I manage content for various VOIP companies (not so interesting), have time for blogging, creatively contribute to the design process (more fun), SEO and other goodies.
Oh, I'd like to address why I named this blog's subtitle, "my life as it hits me." Growing up without your papers makes for an unpredictable future, one that can be frustrating and sometimes scary. This is how life has come at me...hitting me with new experiences and countless setbacks. While not everything has been figured out, it's much better now than ever. I am grateful for everything and everyone in my life who have somehow shaped it.
Well, that's it for now. It's a good start.
Thanks for reading!
Urmi
I'm (finally) starting this blog to get myself to open up about my life and share talents that I myself am just discovering. So it'll be personal, sometimes political, more crafty and filled with family tidbits of fun. Sorry, there's no one word that sums up all that.
I'm 29 for a precious few more days, a mother of two wonderful boys, we'll call them A & M, and wife to the love of my life (cheesy, I know). He's Ali, the man I met while in college, fell head over heals over, married and once graduated, moved to the other side of the state with.
Such is my life that my boys are young enough to cuddle, read to and still enjoy their "firsts." These are some of the best years.
I recently just got my driver's permit, ugh! I know. Why did I wait so long? Legal matters, my friends. President Obama passed the Deferred Action Policy last year, which has undoubtedly changed my life...since I got my approval letter. I can drive! Legally, too. Not to mention a relief from the threat of deportation for 2 years (yes, that's some serious shit). Thanks Mr. President.
You would think that a girl who graduates from college determined to become a journalist, who realizes her legal woes won't allow her to travel, drive or work will now, FINALLY go for it when the government has granted their permission. Well, life is not that simple. Motherhood, it has changed it all.
I find myself missing my kids, feeling guilty even if I think of leaving for the entire day. Thankfully, I've found some middle ground. I work as a Copy Manager at Enrich Ventures (this name will soon change). My hubby owns it, we work from the same office...it's awesome. I manage content for various VOIP companies (not so interesting), have time for blogging, creatively contribute to the design process (more fun), SEO and other goodies.
Oh, I'd like to address why I named this blog's subtitle, "my life as it hits me." Growing up without your papers makes for an unpredictable future, one that can be frustrating and sometimes scary. This is how life has come at me...hitting me with new experiences and countless setbacks. While not everything has been figured out, it's much better now than ever. I am grateful for everything and everyone in my life who have somehow shaped it.
Well, that's it for now. It's a good start.
Thanks for reading!
Urmi
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